End of My Fitness Hiatus

“What are you guys doing???” Whatever we want! We’re grown! Went to leg day yesterday. At PlayFITStayFIT. Haven’t been there in a minute. Because PlayFITStayFIT classes coincide with my post-work coma schedule. It’s hard to work around that. Because work is fully draining. Like, as I’m walking out of the building at 4pm (3:56 pm…because … Continue reading End of My Fitness Hiatus

PFSF Dress Code Violation

So, I’m the reason PlayFITStayFIT may have to implement a dress code. I went to leg day this week. And I was the star student. Like, J-Vicious wasn’t saying I was the best student in class. But he was saying the others were the worst. Which automatically makes me the best. So I was feeling … Continue reading PFSF Dress Code Violation

Working Out With My Gram Grams

I’d like to talk to someone about getting a punch card, please. “Ok. I can help you with that. What questions do you have?” …I would like to know if I can get a punch card, please? “Oh. Yeah. Sure. People just usually have questions about how the punch card works.” I mean…I come to … Continue reading Working Out With My Gram Grams

How My Gyms Are Failing Me

“Ok! Here’s the workout! Sunshine! Put your phone down!” It’s work. I need to respond to this. “Put it down. Now.” Just. I just have to answer this question for them real quick. “Do any of your other five gyms let you use your phone during workouts?” I mean, I sit the phone right beside … Continue reading How My Gyms Are Failing Me

Its Called Supplementing

I’ve been told that I’m not allowed to complain. Or whine. About being sore. I was also accused of cheating. Which is absurd. Because I do not have the energy or motivation required to cheat. I’m not known for managing even one man’s drama. I sure as fuck ain’t tryin to manage two. Or more. … Continue reading Its Called Supplementing

Sometimes I Wear Pants

“Good morning, Sunshine! You look nice today!” …Thanks…I mean I’m just…wearing pants? I guess that’s…kind of fancy? But thanks… “No, you just usually…I don’t ever see you wearing…pants…” …Ok. That’s fair. I just…pants are usually so hard to wear. With their unreasonable buttons and shit. But I’ve recently managed enough gym time. And running time. … Continue reading Sometimes I Wear Pants